What Nurtures You?

One of the coolest chicks in the blogosphere suggested that we all come up with twenty things that nurture us. Everyone who has taken this challenge seriously has approached it in a slightly different way, which is one of the things that makes blog communities so cool… the differences within the similarities.

For me, I must define. Nurture - to care for and encourage the growth or development of

Since really only humans can care for and nurture other humans, what we’re really looking for here are twenty things that inspire us to nurture ourselves.

Here we go:

1 – The scents of my woman
Which makes me think of the feel of her skin, which makes me think of other nurturing things I will not bring up…

2 – “Hey Dad,” as I walk in the front door at night
If those two words don’t ease my soul, nothing will.

3 – Golf
The last seven years of my life would not be the same without those long walks and the man-bonding previously missing in nearly my entire adult life.

4 – The smell and feel of a brand new, electronic gadget
When you first open that seal and the solenoids, microchips and freshly pressed plastic give off that virgin blast of chemicals and powder coating, I’m in heaven.

5 – Long, lovely conversations with my lady
From our first days together, fifteen years ago, we’ve enjoyed great, hours-long conversations. And to this day, I can’t wait to hear what she has to say.

6 – Writing
All of it. From underwriting memorandums at work, to poems, to novels, short-stories, blog entries, blog comments, e-mails… even f’in tweets. I love it all. It is the most joy I can have solamente.

7 – A hug from any of my sisters
They are the best four huggers in our entire family, maybe in the whole world. A hug from one of those ladies literally makes the stress in my body evaporate. I think they might be mystical witches or something.

8 – A big, home cooked meal
I’m talking about the meat and potatoes kind. Meat loaf or pork chops, spaghetti or chili. It’s the kind of meal you smell from the street.

9 – Cuddling with the kids in my chair
If I had known how good this was, I would have used it more to my advantage when I was a kid. Dad, I’ll cuddle with you after dinner if I can have some ice cream.

10 – My brother’s laugh
So full, so rich, so genuine. When my brother is laughing, my heart is happy.

11 – Driving, alone, on a long trip
It’s close to my only meditation, and I love it.

12 – Seeing confidence in my children
We want them to be safe, we want them to be happy and then we want them to be confident.

13 – A heavy nap in my chair while my family spins around me
I could sleep in a hurricane. And they are all so patient with my unconscious state of mind.

14 – Many ounces of porterhouse, black on the outside, dark red on the inside
Oh, ‘ell, man, if you are going to eat a steak, eat one with some personality. No steak has more variety of taste than a full-sized porterhouse.

15 – Pine trees on a dusty trail under a hot summer sun
The combination of scents is almost intoxicating.

16 – Strong female vocalists
Norah Jones, Terri Nunn, Melissa Etheridge, Ann Wilson, Markéta Irglová, Alicia Keys. I love them all.

17 – Sun is out after a hard rain and the birds in the front yard are chorusing
One of the most vibrant expressions of life I experience.

18 – The treadmill
Okay, this is another meditation after driving. I have never spent time on the treadmill and not been happy about it.

19 – Caring about a character in a book I’m reading
I recently was reading a wedding scene and I started to cry. I’m a ten-year old girl.

20 – Family trip to the coast
Let it all go and camp out on a Nor Cal beach for a couple of days. That will cure anything….

and nurture much.




  1. (Skips the reference to porterhouse, as a tear slides from her eye, thinking of her little chocolate colored baby in her cowshed...sniff....sigh...)

    I think there are actually so many different categories where we can list 20 things that nourish or nurture us: spiritually, materially, emotionally, physically....how can we put them all in one mixed up list? I tried and failed, but it was such a lovely exercise. I love that you did it :) Thank you Spencer...give your sis a decaffeinated hug from me :))) xoxox (sticks tongue out)

  2. I like that your first item on this list is associated with your woman. I like that you are okay with letting others know you can cry while reading a book. I like that your children are an integral part of your happiness. like that your siblings are dear to you. I like that music is really heard by you. And I like what writing means to you.

  3. Lovely, sir...

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K (who like her ribeye seared and rare)

  4. Food you can smell from the street!
    Well said, man...
    nothing better than a warm welcome home featuring garlic and the aromatics :)


  5. Hey Braja,
    Sorry about the porterhouse. :) Definitely this is a wide open task, which i really like. Less repetition. Decaf hug on the way. :)

    TB. Thank you very much.

    Thanks Kyddryn. I'll take a ribeye like that any day, but I do prefer the combo flavors of a giant porter.

    Hey Rene. Oh, yeah, garlic. Mmmmm.

  6. Hey Spencer, That was a tough assignment but you narrowed it down and told a lot about yourself. High five!

    What jumped out at me was "my chair"-- You said that twice. My dad had "his chair" too. I hadn't thought about that for years. But Dad's have chairs and they are perfect for napping and cuddling and sharing so many things with your family. It made me smile for you and your family... and my dad.


  7. Hey Joanna, thank you. Yeah, my dad's chair has a special place in my childhood memories. I went through a couple of recliners, then my lady found "my chair" on craigslist and we went and picked it up and it is perfect. I hope it lasts for 20 years. :)

  8. Mr. Casey, great writing! I think you have nailed the concept. I, too remember your dad's chair and the smell of his pipe smoke.
    Funny how "Dad's chair" is such an icon, isn't it?
    Thanks for the reminder of things cherished both past and present.

    Matt (no more squeaky voice, but I probably still talk too much!)

  9. SLC, your list filled my eyes, if you know what I mean. I loved reading it. Initially I thought 'how am I going to come up with 20'. Once I started though I could have easily gone to 40. This proves your comment that as humans we need nurturing and we need to feel nurtured ie cared for and loved and there are so many people, feelings and yes, gadgets, that contribute to that sense of being nurtured. I want to read your list again!


    PS Alicia, Norah, Melissa...love them all too :)

  10. Hey Matt! Thanks for reading. (all my regular readers should know that Matt is one of my very best friends from my f'd up childhood) I appreciate your comments and reminding me about Dad's pipe as well. Maybe I should get myself some Whiskey Tobacco and a pipe, eh?

    Thank you Mervat. It was really fun to write these. I don't often do the assignment-type blogs, but this one just inspired. Your comments mean a lot.



  11. You are such a passionate guy--really comes across in this post.

    Hope you are well, SLC!



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