All the tools to make Facebook exactly what you want it to be... are right there.

For the ultra-passive, simply scroll past unwanted posts.

For the semi-passive, press the little caret and select "Hide Post". By itself this action is completely worthless of course, because the chances of coming across that post in your feed again are nearly zero anyway. It's the online equivalent of saying "I don't like this and here's what I'm doing about it."... to an empty room. (Seinfeld reference.)

For the not quite aggressive, after you "Hide Post" you can often (but not always) select "See Less from -----." In this case the ----- is the source of the meme that is causing all this selecting in the first place. This is useful, eventually. The meme factories are so vast in number, however, you have to really work to reduce the noise.

You can also get a tiny bit more aggressive and select "See Less from *****." In this case the ***** is the friend who is posting the meme. This works a little faster than the previous option, although you risk missing out on that person's life in general, which is kind of the point of Facebook.

For the fairly aggressive there is the "Unfollow" option. It's a little like saying, "I want you to listen to me, but I no longer want to listen to you."... to an empty room. But you are guaranteed to no longer see that person's point of view, so it certainly has its place. And you can always un-unfollow them later.

For the solidly aggressive one can choose to unfriend someone. This is a little like saying, "We should not interact on any level on Facebook."... to an empty room. Yes, still an empty room. Unless it's Grandma Betty who has exactly fifteen friends, that unfriended will probably never know.

The very aggressive way about it is to unfriend with a post on your page, not mentioning names or getting too far into detail, but making it clear that you unfriended someone for behavior you did not appreciate. This allows some vague commensuration from your better friends.

And then there's the ultra aggressive. This is the unfriend option preceded by a message, either posted on Facebook or sent directly to the individual, or both. It's a little like screaming in somebody's face and attacking who they are as a person. I don't recommend this last option. It's can only lead to bad things. But it works for some people.

I bring this up because after being gone for three months and returning for a bit, I have found Facebook has become almost unbearable. The constant stream of political and belief-system mindless attacks and defenses overwhelm nearly everything else. And I do mean mindless.

So I'm trying to decide what to do. Do I unfollow, unfriend or just get over it and shut the hell up. I mean these people, you people, are for the most part... my friends and family. I want to know what's going on in your lives. I want to know that your dog is OK after his encounter with a skunk or a porcupine. I want to follow your fitness progress and get your likes when I brag about mine. I want to see your new garden or your new car or your new offspring. I want to see birthday pictures, pictures of your Maui vacation and pictures of your attempt at your grandma's chicken pot pie.

But the weight of the ultra negative, over-shared, and often completely fictional memes is tipping the scale. I'm just not sure it's worth it anymore. I'm not alive, not on this planet, to be bombarded by hate and intolerance... at least not voluntarily. None of us are.

I can't change the tide of Facebook, so I may need to just go unfollow crazy. The hide post, see less from ---- doesn't seem to be making a dent.

Well I feel better. How about you?


  1. Casey! Great to hear from you. Hope all is well with you and your family.

    I totally hear you about Facebook-- I simply do not have the patience for it AT ALL anymore. There is so much junk out there that multiple people seem to need to post over and over again-- and now with the elections coming up. OMG! It's eye-rolling.

    I took the easy (or is it cowardly) way out and started a new FB page with only my family-- 14 total. My siblings and I have been bossing each other around for years so it's easy to tell them when it's time to knock it off or change subjects when they "overshare" nonsense.

    I still have my first page but I rarely look at it.

    But really-- I feel like social media has taken over and I wish people would just pick up the phone and call to chat once in a while.



    1. Hi Joanna! So nice to see you. Thanks for stopping by. A second Facebook account? That's something to consider for sure. It can be maddening. Are you still blogging? Nevermind. I'll check right now. I'm trying to become a writer again. Miss it. Thanks!

  2. I seldom unfriend, and if I am offended (usually by students who forgot to whom they are talking to) i just block them.
    I seem to have quite a long list of blocked accounts :P

    1. I haven't done the blocking much. Maybe that's my problem. Even if I really disagree with one thing a person says or does, I still want to know about what's going on in their life. So I hesitate.


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