Joy and Pain – Life is the mix…


There is a lot to be up and down about right now...

JOY
THE APPLE iPAD
Apple iPad is coming out tomorrow. I won’t get mine for 3 weeks, but I love reading all the reviews and the news about the momentum of this machine. I’m starting to go a little nutty with anticipation. I’ve gone on iTunes and put several aps in my wish list, although I’m not expecting to purchase most of them it’s fun to create my own little mini-store. Included in my list is a car racing game, a painting program, Apple’s word processor and facebook and Tweetdeck apps.

I really feel like the gift is also the curse. It's always half-and-half. Whatever brings you the most joy will also probably bring you the most pain. Always a price to pay.
Alice Hoffman

PAIN
LOSS OF LIFE
The passing of the mother of my 21-year old daughter was a huge blow to our family’s psychosis. Two weeks later the dimness of our days is just now starting to lift a bit. My girl will be grieving for a long time and my heart breaks every time I hear the sadness in her voice. I’m her daddy in every way and I love her with everything I am. I can only be here for her. Men like to fix things, quickly as possible. But in some circumstances there are no fixes but time.

There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief.
Aeschylus.

JOY
GOLF GUYS WEEKEND 2010
Next Friday is Golf Guys Weekend. This is our third year. First it was four of us in Vegas playing 4 rounds in two days. Last year we did Phoenix, AZ area and grew to six guys and five rounds in three days. This year we’re going back to Vegas and there are nine of us and we’ve ended up with five rounds again including Angel Park, Boulder Creek and Rhodes Ranch. The only no’s for this weekend are no whining, no women and no salads.

The sweetest joy, the wildest woe is love. What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.
Pearl Bailey

PAIN
WORK
Work continues to twist me. There was a couple in our branch a few days ago. They were here to sign documents. They are barely holding on to their business. I’ve become the bad guy in their sadness and they didn’t even look into my office as they walked by. I considered them friends as well as customers. I cared and care for their wellbeing. I hope they come out of it. The whole thing makes my heart hurt and makes me wonder if I might be in the wrong line of work. How did I get here?

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
Erma Bombeck

JOY
ODYSSEY OF THE MIND
Odyssey of the Mind ended last weekend. As my wife was the coach for these six kids (which included my 8 and 10) this event has been a part of daily conversation for about seven months. While I am so proud of what they accomplished and learned and so happy about their advancement to the state level of competition, I am so glad it’s over. Already the chaos level in our home has greatly diminished.

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.
Joseph Campbell

PAIN
MONEY
I’m terrible with money. Funny (or not) for a banker. I’m exceptional at analyzing, underwriting, helping my customers manage their money. It just doesn’t translate to me personally. At my age I should have it down. I have a very strong desire to revert to a time with no mortgage, no credit cards, no myriad of extra obligations that seem to drain me every month. But the trap has been sprung and now I work to fulfill those obligations. When bills are paid I can’t help but add up in my head how many hours of take-home pay it took to cover each one. That’s not a good thing over which to obsess. I wonder if there’s a 12-step program for bad money managers.

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain... To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.
Kevyn Aucoin

Cheers,

SLC

Comments

  1. Unknown3/4/10 01:40

    Ah.... the pain and joy of Mr Spencer....

    Joy; All work and no play makes Spence a dull boy. All play and no work makes Spence have no money to pay his bills! - me

    Pain; No pain, no gain. By administering pain liberally in class, more students passed the latest exam, than last time - me :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. CiCi3/4/10 06:59

    This is a well written, thoughtful post. There is pain and joy and peace and war in life, in families and in countries. How we deal with the things that hurt shows up in how we deal with the joys. Your just being there for your 21 year old daughter, available and consistent, will help her travel her road through the stages of grief. You definitely are in a tough business. My son is still hanging in there as a loan officer at a bank in HI and our whole family was at one time in that business. I don't miss it at all.
    I know you have follow the guidelines of investors when you dole out the loans. Some people keep hanging on and keep trying for loans to stay afloat. You can only do what you can do. Odyssey of the Mind must have been a good thing for the children. I hope you and your family can relax and have a good Easter together.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Joanna Jenkins3/4/10 20:02

    Lots in this post SLC--

    I've thought about your daughter many times and keep her in my prayers. Loss is very difficult and she's young to have to deal with such a big one.

    The iPad-- I am soooo tempted but holding off for a little while longer. It looks awesome.

    The banking biz-- OMG, I do not know how you do it. That is one tough gig!

    I read a little about the Odyssey of the Mind-- What a fabulous educational program for kids! I take my hat off to your family participating.

    And golf-- That was the only stipulation I made with my husband when we got married-- No golf! Fortunately he's not a golfer so we got hitched. Hope your Vegas weekend is grand and full of low scores!

    I'm just back from Spring Break vacation and glad I was able to catch up on your posts.

    Happy weekend,
    jj

    ReplyDelete
  4. Casey Freeland3/4/10 20:17

    Shadow, you are hilarious! Thanks for the great comment. Your kids must be scared to death of you.

    Thanks Techno. So, what did you family go into from banking? My daughter is here right now instead of an hour away. Makes me very happy. Happy Easter!

    Hey Joanna, thanks for all the replies. It was a full post, wasn't it? Became a bit obsessive there for a few. Thank you especially for keeping Jessie in your prayers. She needs all the positive vibes she can get.

    Cheers,

    SLC

    ReplyDelete
  5. Suzy23/4/10 16:53

    I have a friend whose last name is Weed. She said that growing up all she had to do was introduce herself and she never had to buy pot. EVER.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Casey Freeland23/4/10 18:03

    That's awesome. These days there's so much pot floating around I'm surprised anybody every has to buy it.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

This is where you come in...

Popular posts from this blog

Hotel

Image
I feel like every time I come over to Crescent City I write the same blog post. You know, appreciate my family, wish I was home, like driving by myself, love my wife, want to hug my kids, blah blah blah. So let's try something different. When you are away from home and by yourself: What's on the radio on the road? I've gone through stages for sure. NPR, scanning for local stations, my own iPod music etc. But for the last couple of years it's been audiobooks and nothing else. I belong to audible.com now and get a new book every month for $15. I have a bumper sticker that says, "Shhhh, I'm listening to a book." What kind of crap do you eat? Do you go to a restaurant? My love has no trouble at all spending the evening by herself at a busy restaurant. I'm not made that way. I usually buy some frozen garbage I can nuke in the hotel microwave that will make my tummy ache for the rest of the night. What kind of TV do you watch? Channel 45 for me here, whi...
Read more

Her Cottage

Image
She lives in a one room, cozy cottage she built in the middle of a lush green forest. Her home sits in a grassy clearing, backed up to the base of a fern-covered cliff where in the Spring, sweet clean water trickles down to her waiting barrels. Tiny, baby blue flowers grow amongst the ferns on tender, too-thin stems of pale green. She is young, and happy, and full of hope. One day a pebble dislodges from the very top of the cliff. It’s not much larger than her smallest finger. It tumbles as it falls, briefly touching its brothers along the way. Seeing the pebble’s joy, the brothers break free and join his race down the steep slope. Others join, larger friends, who bring larger friends. And soon they are singing a thunderous roar of glee as they race each other ever faster down. She hears the song and runs out of her cabin, looking up to see them ripping through the ferns, plucking the flowers and consuming all in their bliss. She backs away, then trips. As she hits the gr...
Read more

What Nurtures You?

Image
One of the coolest chicks in the blogosphere suggested that we all come up with twenty things that nurture us. Everyone who has taken this challenge seriously has approached it in a slightly different way, which is one of the things that makes blog communities so cool… the differences within the similarities. For me, I must define. Nurture - to care for and encourage the growth or development of Since really only humans can care for and nurture other humans, what we’re really looking for here are twenty things that inspire us to nurture ourselves. Here we go: 1 – The scents of my woman Which makes me think of the feel of her skin, which makes me think of other nurturing things I will not bring up… 2 – “Hey Dad,” as I walk in the front door at night If those two words don’t ease my soul, nothing will. 3 – Golf The last seven years of my life would not be the same without those long walks and the man-bonding previously missing in nearly my entire adult life. 4 – The smell and fee...
Read more